New to Large? Here's a highlights reel to illustrate what you can expect from everyone's favourite topical radio show:
Episode 120 - 'Formality'
First broadcast 20th January 2017
Handshakes and penguin suits all round as Mike combs his hair and watches his mouth for long enough to make a good impression for an important engagement with Her Majesty's Criminal Justice System. What are these strange customs and dress codes we demand of others and ourselves, and what function do they perform? Listen on for a lesson in etiquette and courtesy, soon disregarded and mocked by our disrespectful dilettantes.
Episode 119 - 'Whistleblowing'
First broadcast 2nd January 2017
Telling tales or ensuring ethical excellence? Attention-seeking snitch or social justice warrior? These moral dichotomies, and many more, are shot into the air like confetti as Mike invites you to blow his whistle, baby. Meanwhile, Aaron pushes the silent alarm and prepares his statement for the authorities.
Episode 118 - 'Preservation'
First broadcast 20th December 2016
Food and corpses tend to rot too quickly for convenience, while digital data is always at risk from corruption and theft. What we need are ways to protect these important things for longer...Wikipedia will tell us how! The preservation of all of the above, plus a few more are on the proverbial whiteboard tonight, though strangely not life itself. Make of that what you will.
Episode 117 - 'Cosplay'
First broadcast 5th December 2016
The weird and wonderful world of costume play is well worth examining Ingenuity and imagination combined with a photogenic figure makes for a cosplay sensation, and Mike is determined to knuckle down and study the subject intensely. Just don't ask to see his Spiderman under any circumstances.
Episode 116 - 'Nightclubbing'
First broadcast 19th October 2016
Dressed to the nines and feeling fine, the night soon goes downhill as Mike gets lairy with the men and cheeky with the women. Some illicit substances and lewd dancing later, the head bouncer makes Mike's enemy list, as he sleeps it off in a holding cell.
Episode 115 - 'Marriage'
First broadcast 8th October 2016
Going together like a horse and carriage, the witless wonders proceed to catch the bouquet while gabbering about nuptials and bondage until they're thrown out of the church. Is the spirit of matrimony still sacrosanct, despite Mike's best efforts? There's only one way to find out.
Episode 114 - 'Incarceration'
First broadcast 20th January 2016
Prepare to burn your mattress and throw it at the screws, as our two jailbait-chasers are on 'lockdown' for inciting a prison riot. With all the time in the world to think about what they've done, Mike and Aaron use their captivity to discuss means, motive and opportunity for imprisonment, as well as some inappropriate gags about prison sex.
Episode 113 - 'Betrayal'
First broadcast 18th September 2015
Dante judged those guilty of treachery to be among the worst sinners, frozen in the deepest circle of the Inferno, and that's where Mike soon regrets taking a leak. Expect to hear rigorous and possibly infantile debate on the motives for betrayal, as well as a lowdown on history's most famous back-stabbers.
Episode 112 - 'Awards'
First broadcast 12th June 2015
Recognition comes in many forms, but Aaron and Mike only care about the kind that comes with a precious metal lustre in this trophy-laden edition of the usually sparsely-decorated topical radio fiasco. Hear about the many forms of peer approval and adulation as Mike's spiteful envy sees him kick the podium over at the Paralympics.
Episode 111 - 'Body modification'
First broadcast 4th June 2015
Our two mutilated grotesques spend a little too long lingering on the more nauseating prospects of body augmentation, including anal tattooing, voluntary amputation, and everything in between. More than a few cautionary tales and wince-inducing verbal images abound, in this unforgettably embellished episode that would leave Dr Frankenstein himself in raptures!
Episode 110 - 'Trolling'
First broadcast 28th May 2015
They see us trollin' - they hatin'. Or we are. Drunken hecklers; catcallers; bullies; all real-life versions of the online phenomena: the troll. As rude as he is gluttonous, you should never feed a troll after midnight. Or at all. Stalking online forums only to sow discord and abuse, it's no surprise to hear Mike having a modicum of sympathy for these love-starved weirdos. What constitutes trolling and what are its motivations? Listen on to find out. Just try not to be a sensitive little flower.
Episode 109 - 'Advertising'
First broadcast 24th March 2015
They say you can roll excrement in glitter and it will still be excrement, but what if you launch a multimedia viral campaign on the benefits and social status glitter-encrusted filth will afford you? What if your favourite celebrity was snapped with one in their handbag, or it appeared as the object of idolatry in a bling-drenched music video? Perhaps coming a close third in the fabrication stakes only to the realms of politics and Public Relations, Aaron and Mike lift a lid on the extraordinarily expensive and illusory fantasy world of advertising.
Episode 108 - 'Gardening'
First broadcast 15th January 2015
Our two creeping weeds query how Mary-Quite-Contrary's garden grows, while Mike typically beats around her bush, and leaves his green thumbprints all over the scene of the crime...
Episode 107 - 'Dance'
First broadcast 27th November 2014
'Grease'? 'Flashdance'? Well Mike has certainly been described as greasy and has been known to flash on the dancefloor. His representative also clarified that in Mike's opinion, the dirtier the dancing, the better. Slut-drop with the two twerking twerps as they examine the human body in sensual rhythmic motion.
Episode 106 - 'Creation'
First broadcast 17th October 2014
Feel that spark of ingenuity, that explosion of euphoric rapture in making something original! Only to discover someone else thought of it, and made it, a lot better before you. What this has to do with everyone's favourite groundbreaking online radio show is beyond me. Just listen and all will become clear. Maybe.
Episode 105 - 'Performance Art'
First broadcast 3rd October 2014
Dropping their kecks, necking brake fluid and firing up the Bunsen burner, our two maladjusted miscreants play with dangerous and sordid implements purely to convey a profound artistic statement to the esoteric masses. Will you get it?
Episode 104 - 'Fitness'
First broadcast 19th August 2014
F is for Fat, I is for Idle and T is for....never you mind. Our two out-of-shape oafs illicit suggestions on treating their body as a temple rather than a slagheap from special guest and bodybuilding enthusiast; Greig Ross. Besides the sensible advice, rest assured there will be plenty of roister-doistering from our resident slovenly slobs.
Episode 103 - 'Housework'
First broadcast 19th June 2014
Stock up with Ajax and prepare yourselves for a life of banal drudgery slaving away over a hot stove and retrieving the head of the bog brush, for the Sisyphean theme of domestic labour.
Episode 102 - 'Engineering'
First broadcast 22nd May 2014
Our pair of dense pillars take the piston again, as they investigate what happens when Mother Maths and Father Physics love each other so much that they perform carnal acts to create a functional art baby.
Episode 101 - 'Human Nature'
First broadcast 8th April 2014
Listen on as our two primates climb down from the trees to see what it feels like to shower and walk upright. While they're down, they restrain themselves from hurling excrement for long enough to discuss the motivations, ideals and patterns of behaviour observed in their close cousins: the human race.
Episode 100 - 'Goldeneye 64 and banter'
First broadcast 28th March 2014
To celebrate this most momentous of centenaries, Mike and Aaron invite Chairman of the LNL fan club to the party, Mr Eric Smith. The three then proceed to lay waste to each other verbally and with proximity mines, in this memorable flagship edition of your favourite online radio fiasco!
Episode 99 - 'Disease'
First broadcast 14th March 2014
What does Late Night Large have in common with disease? It's always growing. Whether it gives you the shakes, makes your skin fall off or eject your internal organs through your lower colon, /mike and Aaron want to discuss it. Preferably at the dinner table.
Episode 98 - 'Espionage'
First broadcast 27th February 2014
We all like to imagine our perverted voyeurism is somehow both sexy and vital to national security, so here our two creepers discuss the minefield of 'espiolarge'. Highlights include Mike terrifying children at the local swimming pool with his own brand of 'dumpster diving'...
Episode 97 - 'Poisons'
First broadcast 21st February 2014
Whether wet, powdery or viscous, tonight's deliberation involves the saboteurs of the central nervous system and beyond, so strap on your skull and crossbones and ready the stomach pump!
Episode 96 - 'Housing'
First broadcast 31st January 2014
If we don't get some shelter....we're gonna fade away. All hail the sink estates, yurts, yaodongs and bus shelters for providing a place to rest our weary heads that offers at least basic protection from the elements.
Episode 95 - 'Hair'
First broadcast 24th January 2014
Whether it's unsightly, matted or much-missed, body hair is undoubtedly an integral component of the human. Whether you express your individuality through some rainbow mohawk/dreadlock hybrid, or have a veritable carpet of back hair, this show is for you.
Episode 94 - 'Disney'
First broadcast 10th January 2014
They may not have ever met their Prince Charming, lived under the sea or used sorcery to do the housework, but there is more than a little Pinocchio in Mike, and as for the story of his night with seven dwarves, that's best left untold. Our two cartoonish anti-heroes discuss the globe-straddling fairytale and merchandise behemoth that is Disney, its roots, legacy, and the dubious background of the man who made it all possible...
Episode 93 - 'Patriarchy' (a fragment)
First broadcast 3rd January 2014
Mike and Aaron check out everything but their privilege in this particularly flavoursome show on male dominance, so volatile indeed that the second half of the original recording vanished into the airwaves, never to be heard from again. Never fear though, half a Large is still stronger than the average full pint!
Episode 92 - 'Decoration'
First broadcast 20th December 2013
Slap some bells, whistles and a witty bumper sticker on as Late Night Large steps out in style, before returning home to a cake covered in delectable icing shaped to resemble something.
Episode 91 - 'Sleep'
First broadcast 29th November 2013
Relax and knock back a few roofies as you enjoy this show devoted to mankind's restorative of choice. We spend one third of our lives asleep, so make sure you maximise the other two thirds with your favourite topical radio show!
Episode 90 - 'Conflict'
First broadcast 22nd November 2013
The essence of dramaturgy is on the agenda tonight, as our two bears with sore heads get lairy and argumentative over trivial issues. Is conflict always a bad thing, or has it in fact moved mankind forward to a higher state of being? Just watch who you're looking at.
Episode 89 - 'Magic'
First broadcast 14th November 2013
What sorcery is this? Sit back, relax and marvel as Mike makes a rabbit appear from out of his trousers. Our two warlocks of whimsy wave their impotent wands around in honour of the art of illusion as they debate the meaning, morals and mysticism of show magic and the black arts.
Episode 88 - 'Torture'
First broadcast 1st November 2013
Tighten those screws, sharpen those blades and stoke those flames: it's time for torment. Like the sick, twisted abominations they are, our two executioner generals pick over the dead meat of suffering, and question why and how it has progressed to such a level. Weapons of choice, length of treatment and desired result are the aspects under the microscope.
Episode 87 - 'Education'
First broadcast 25th October 2013
Knowledge is the only authentic form of power according to some (including at least one half of our duo), but how is it best imparted? Is it a commodity to flog, or a treasure to bestow? Listen on for wisdom, my children.
Episode 86 - 'Navigation'
First broadcast 18th October 2013
If you don't know your go-karting from your geo-caching, or your orienteering from your amethyst earring, then this is the show for you! Our two plucky pioneers wander lost in the desert for longer than the Hebrews as they seek to find their bearings, which you can bet it is mightily amusing.
Episode 85 - 'Hospitality'
First broadcast 11th October 2013
If all the people in the world camped out in your back garden, would you write and tell the King, or would you grab a tent and join them? Lay the table, boil the kettle and fling open the door for this genial slice of Large which surprisingly has nothing to do with accident and emergency.
Episode 84 - 'Therapy'
First broadcast 4th October 2013
Anybody who's spent any period of time around Mike will doubtless require some form of therapy. The question is will they require their mind, body or soul rehabilitated? The various forms of professional healing are discussed to death in this thrilling episode.
Episode 83 - 'Crafts'
First broadcast 27th September 2013
Listen on as our crafty cretins fail miserably to keep their hands to themselves, and explain how, in the far distant past, man rather than machine used to make things, and how a few hardy rustic folk still do.
Episode 82 - 'Idolatry'
First broadcast 20th September 2013
Our two idle wretches talk idols and retch in this plinth-mounted debate. Is any form of worship healthy or mutually beneficial? When does admiration beget infatuation beget obsession? All these questions and more will seek to be answered by our two anti-heroes with an unhealthy attraction to themselves.
Episode 81 - 'Self-Help'
First broadcast 13th September 2013
Why help others when you can't get your own life right? Do you really want other people to point out what you're doing wrong? And pay them for the pleasure? That might not seem enticing, but watching free video demonstrations on youtube can indeed prevent you mugging yourself off, so swings and roundabouts.
Episode 80 - 'Fads'
First broadcast 6th September 2013
If it's really better to burn out than fade away, then we should all aspire to be fads. Our two legends in their own lunchtime debate what constitutes a fad, how best to ignore them, and crazes that we actually reminisce fondly over. Just stick some lurid colours, infantile music and a cute anthropomorphised animal on us.
Episode 79 - 'Puzzles'
First broadcast 16th August 2013
Unlock the mysterious nightmare box and open the gates of Hell, as we delve into the labyrinth of the mind, and ponder over why man seeks to find words in jumbles of letters, or arrange numbers in a preordained sequence, never mind move little pieces of wood around a chequered board for hours.
Episode 78 - 'Communication'
First broadcast 9th August 2013
From a primal scream to a menacing whisper as you brandish the machete, there are many methods of conveying thoughts and ideas to our fellow humans. The motives are limitless and the means just as much. Are we trying to sell our recipient a product, or an idea? Are we attempting to kill them with kindness, or bullets? Or, as Mike so eloquently puts it: 'Am I eating it, fighting it or f***ing it?'
Episode 77 - 'Pets'
First broadcast 2nd August 2013
Everyone wishes for subordinate underlings, but it's not so easy to house-train humans and convince them to follow you on a lead. Tonight's discussion centres on the cute, the smelly and the downright vicious animals that we share our homes and businesses with. Be prepared for skinny pigs, Satanic goats and pugs in little tuxedos dragging around miniature trailers with drinks and finger food on them.
Episode 76 - 'Festivals'
First broadcast 26th July 2013
Live the dream by not washing for three days and sharing your toilet with thousands of people, as Mike and Aaron inhale and ingest everything they come across to frolic mindlessly in a field. What is it about festivals that brings diverse people together? Music? Camping? Beer? Free love? Listen on to find out.
Episode 75 - 'Choice'
First broadcast 19th July 2013
Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a f**king big television, Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin can openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Choose fixed-interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisure wear and matching luggage. Choose a three piece suit on hire purchase in a range of fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who the f**k you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, f**ked-up brats you have spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose Large! From the mundane to the momentous, the theme of the hour is choice, and all its glorious ramifications!
Episode 74 - 'Oceans'
First broadcast 12th July 2013
There will be no accusations, just friendly crustaceans. Setting sail on the storm-tossed seven seas in a pea-green boat, our resident owl and pussycat navigate around effulgence and floating shards of consumer waste as they deliberate the topography and beasties residing beneath the surface of the seventy-something percent of our planet we can't possibly live on.
Episode 73 - 'Gameshows'
First broadcast 21st June 2013
Slap on some teak tan and bleach those pearly whites, it's time to see what you could have won! Up there with finest editions, this Late Night Large delves into the nostalgic and often hilariously cringey UK gameshow archives. Cheesy hosts; iconic catchphrases; dim contestants; fabulous prizes; they're all here! Sidestep to your left, Simon.
Episode 72 - 'Summer'
First broadcast 7th June 2013
That most rapturous of seasons shines its light on the dark recesses of Large in this whimsical instalment of the amateur radio equivalent of the never-ending summer holiday! Expect talk of scandalous bikinis, offensive sunburn and washout holidays, while Mike explains why he likes his meat black and crunchy on the outside, but pink and gristly on the inside.
Episode 71 - 'Saturday Night'
First broadcast 31st May 2013
Once more into the breach, dear boy. The night the rest of the week pays penance to is the centrepiece here. Myth, intrigue and adventure...never has a night been so eulogised over. Like the invention of the teenager, Saturday night is a product of the modern West, and you'd best get yours before it's too late!
Episode 70 - 'Forums'
First broadcast 24th May 2013
Enjoy a forearm smash as our two greasy groomers refuse to play nice online. This discussion centres on the origins of idea exchanges, from Ancient Rome to chatrooms which might be more at home on the Tor network. Democratic free market exchange of ideas, or bubbling cesspit of cretinous cyber-bullies? You decide.
Episode 69 - 'Stimulation'
First broadcast 17th May 2013
Does any more need to be said? Cover your children's ears as Mike steers the car drunkenly towards the red light district for this show that was supposed to be about more than carnal indulgence.
Episode 68 - 'Internet Memes'
First broadcast 10th May 2013
Hilariously ill-researched, our two slack-jawed Luddites stumble to describe that which they do not understand, not for the first time. For the record, this show was recorded prior to their current knowledge of such cultural icons as the 'Philosoraptor', 'First World Problems', 'Sudden Clarity Clarence', 'Old Economy Steve' and the always magnificent American 'Democracy' Eagle.
Episode 67 - 'Toys'
First broadcast 3rd May 2013
Come and indulge your juvenile fantasies, as our two garbage pail kids discuss the items that are more valuable than gold to a pre-teen! In one of the most captivating editions of this always infantile show, marvel at the sense of wonder and lost innocence in their voices, as Mike and Aaron lament the lost toys, and the sacks of coal they received every Christmas.
Episode 66 - 'Power'
First broadcast 26th April 2013
While we are ruled by a government ruled by a corporate elite, hierarchical structures will dominate our lives. Tonight, the discussion centres on as many of these structures as possible: political power, social power, physical power, sexual power, fiscal power, levitation, telekinesis, and the power...to move you.
Episode 65 - 'Disguise'
First broadcast 5th April 2013
Mike and Aaron play the elephants hiding behind the proverbial lamp post, as they attempt to go incognito in the show with more than meets the eye. More fun than walking into a bank wearing nothing but a ski mask.
Episode 64 - 'Flight'
First broadcast 29th March 2013
Join us for take-off in one of the vintage episodes! Man's fondest spiritual quest is scavenged upon from on high, as our two flappers fly too close to the sun and fall to earth with a thump. There are also myriad amusing diversions involving hummingbirds, castle walls and, of course, the clown of the sea. Plus Mike suggests Pingu gets eaten by everything...although he might have got confused.
Episode 63 - 'Usury'
First broadcast 22nd March 2013
Money lending is often the devil's work, and our two part-time advocates debate its moral and material consequences in this rapacious episode of the show without a soul. Leaving aside the fact that most money is simply digital numbers created with no intrinsic value, is it really morally just that a rich man can harvest an income from simply lending the less fortunate among us that which he needs to survive? Or is the world simply full of ignorant cretins with no fiscal discipline but plenty of impulse?
Episode 62 - 'Habitats'
First broadcast 15th March 2013
Our resident cave dwellers crawl from the catacombs to chew the cud on living spaces in all of their forms. From formicaries to clifftops, these two would literally defecate anywhere. But there's more! How did man really spread across the globe, bestriding inhospitable domains beneath his conquering feet? Is it advisable to go streaking in the Arctic Circle, to fall asleep in a bog, or swim in a volcano? The answers to these questions and more will not be found here!
Episode 61 - 'Security'
First broadcast 8th March 2013
Better invest in some razor wire and patrolled watchtowers, as our two safety salamanders lay down your defences in the name of miseducation. If your idea of a safe night involves Mike enlightening you as to why his security career has never really got off the ground, and why he enjoys drinking his own urine, then this is the show for you!
Episode 60 - 'Furniture'
First broadcast 22nd February 2013
Who would have thought that such a trivial topic could provoke such furious arguments? You should know by now that nothing in Late Night Large world is trivial. Our two couch potatoes split proverbial hairs over tables and chairs, while hurling bedknobs and broomsticks at the kitchen sink, in this highly entertaining edition of the show that always strives to be part of your furniture.
Episode 59 - 'Employment'
First broadcast 15th February 2013
A particularly insightful edition asks the question: can one really hope to derive enjoyment from employment? Among the revelations gleaned from Jimmy Wales are the changing face of global employment over recent years, the endless power struggle between employer and employee, and whether our current system actually works for the majority. Expect disagreements and strong language!
Episode 58 - 'Agriculture'
First broadcast 8th February 2013
The show that ploughs many a lone furrow focuses on the wonders of crop cultivation. Mike extols the virtues of growing dirty, confuses irrigation for the colonic kind and sows all the wrong kinds of seed, while Aaron sits back and reaps the harvest.
Episode 57 - 'The Food Chain'
First broadcast 1st February 2013
The two corpulent crazies talk who gobbles, skewers and spit-roasts what according to the law of the jungle. Man-eating dolphins, class war and evolutionary cannibalism all rear their tasty heads downwind from the herd as arrows whizz by. Enjoy all manner of predation and trophic cascades on this fabulous edition of the show that's always difficult to digest.
Episode 56 - 'Lobbying'
First broadcast 25th January 2013
We all want our voices to be heard. Some more than others. Aaron and Mike don't wait for an invitation, and merely yell into your ear. Tonight they sink into the murky bog of claiming access to decision makers and convincing them to work in your favour, why it can be pure in motive, and how it can evolve into legalised bribery.
Episode 55 - 'Charity'
First broadcast 18th January 2013
Attempting to toss their world-weary cynicism aside, our two reluctant philanthropists steal a thousand beggars' change and give it to the rich, as they debate the concept of charity. Why do we perform virtuous deeds when there appears to be little in it for us? Does sacrifice cleanse the soul? Why do we resent paying tax but not contributing to the unfortunate? Could breaking up a fight be deemed charity?
Episode 54 - 'Offspring'
First broadcast 11th January 2013
Our two infantile idiots violate their parole and fake a CRB as they discuss the concept of siring children. What reasons could one have to add to the population, what age is sensible to start a family, and how do you react when your little progenies burn the house down when you're away?
Episode 53 - 'Hoaxes'
First broadcast 14th December 2012
When is a hoax just a prank? Find out the answer to this and many other questions in this edition of the show presented by everyone's favourite prank-monkeys. Bliss and Large get all Fortean Times on your ass, as the most notorious hoaxes of our times are on the agenda, including the Roswell landing and the Loch Ness Monster! The two troublemakers also ask the question many others would suffer a fatwah for...is organised religion the world's biggest hoax?
Episode 52 - 'Fetishes'
First broadcast 7th December 2012
Human beings are remarkable in their need to assign meaning to inanimate objects, and this show delves into that sordid fascination. Aaron endeavours to steer the stupefying stimulation intrigue towards less carnal aspects, questioning whether hoarding or hobbies can be described as fetishes, and why different people have such diverse objects that appeal to some mysterious subconscious craving, while Mike only has his eyes on the bedroom.
Episode 51 - 'Emergencies'
First broadcast 30th November 2012
Try and ignore the deafening sirens and blinding red lights as you calmly make your way out of the building underneath the stampede of Large fans. Learn of the horrific origins of fire exits, how to get a cat out of a tree using only a crossbow, and how Mike got that scar on his arse.
Episode 50 - 'Hygiene'
First broadcast 23rd November 2012
Take a bit of time off from rooting through the rubbish and sharing needles to hear the putrid pair's thoughts on cleanliness, and how close they are to godliness. Hear them touch upon the unrelenting pestilence of the Dark Ages! Imagine a world where people scoff at the notion of microscopic horrors trying to climb into your body and make you sick! Get right between the toes and behind the ears in this classic episode.
Episode 49 - 'Cults'
First broadcast 16th November 2012
Sit back, relax and enjoy some of the punch, as our two charismatic charlatans urge you to join the away team and service their every whim in the name of salvation! Just what is it that compels people of otherwise sound mind to cast off their clothes, dignity and lives for the sake of someone you'd normally throw eggs at on speakers' corner? Listen on to find out!
Episode 48 - 'Bond Films'
First broadcast 9th November 2012
Sit back and stroke your octopussy menacingly as our two rogue agents revel in the movies depicting most men's fantasy character. They invite you to live and let die as they implore that the world is not (large) enough for them. Besides reliving all of the Bond films through the ages, there is enough lad humour to keep any roving spy on an all-time high. After all, nobody does it better.
Episode 47 - 'Gambling'
First broadcast 2nd November 2012
Hold on to your shirts as our brace of serial losers play fast and loose with loaded dice. It's not just about losing everything in games of chance though, as Aaron and Mike delve into the wider perspective of risk: is asking somebody out or quitting your job technically gambling? If so, perhaps even the devoutly sensible could stand to be a little more foolhardy, in pursuit of those true riches of fulfilment.
Episode 46 - 'Reality Television'
First broadcast 26th October 2012
Art imitating life imitating art imitating life imitating...something. Join our two musclebound grotesques as they discuss the bane of most of our entertainment-addled lives. Of course, Big Brother was not watching us, we were watching it...and getting very bored and murderous in the process. But there's also the small matter of watching police and ambulance crews deal with hurt and angry, angry people, as well as watching the bedraggled and disreputable strive to become members of the cultured Establishment norm. What's not to like?
Episode 45 - 'One Year Anniversary Spectacular!'
First broadcast 19th October 2012
To celebrate a full year of broadcasting nonsense, Bliss and Large present a double helping (Mike's favourite) of the show that made them legends in their own lunchtime. Rather than a particular theme, they waste the time taking questions from the facebook page, and answering some universal questions they dug up from a search engine, like the true plagiarist pioneers that they are. Expect gags so bad they should come with a trombone accompaniment.
Episode 44 - 'The Great Outdoors'
First broadcast 12th October 2012
Nature is pretty awesome, as the dopey duo discover on surveying the breadth of their dominion from atop a mighty hill. Among the traumatic topics on the agenda are burying excrement and making a treasure map for your kids to track it down, going commando among friends, and learning what a compass is for.
Episode 43 - 'Health and Safety'
First broadcast 5th October 2012
Masks must be worn in this area. Our two whimpering underdogs get what's coming to them as they discuss the origins, progression and application of health and safety legislation. Is it an essential tool for worker protection, or an avenue for big compensation payouts? The two make much mirth at the misfortune of others, before coming to the conclusion that it's better for kids to be seriously injured than be denied a substandard bouncy castle.
Episode 42 - 'Crime'
First broadcast 14th September 2012
Our two plump gooses become prize stool-pigeons under the merest hint of pressure, as they get weak on crime and the causes of crime. Tonight we learn how prefixing or bookending 'murder' to everything is perhaps how American crime dramas gained their massive popularity, whether the conditions of society create a culture of crime, and bear witness to Mike's flawed defence of consumer culture through a bad car. Hang the jury! It'd be a felony to miss it.
Episode 41 - 'Extreme Sports'
First broadcast 7th September 2012
Strap on the crash helmet, knee pads and adult nappy, as our two adrenaline junkies get more anecdotal than usual and delve into the palpitating prospect of extreme sports. Wrap yourself in tinfoil and climb onto the roof in a thunderstorm to listen on as a full variety of edgy pursuits are debated, while new classifications for extreme sports such as train baiting and drug dealing are pleaded for as Mike 'completes the circle'.
Episode 40 - 'Roads'
First broadcast 31st August 2012
Stand and deliver! Mike asks for your money or your wife, as our two hard-shoulder playboys tailgate, kerb crawl and aquaplane all over the place in an effort to understand what the Romans ever did for us. Among the subjects steamrollered into submission are the different categories and purposes of roads, what road tax is supposed to be for, and the dreaded pirates of the turnpike! A classic to enjoy stuck in an M25 logjam.
Episode 39 - 'Weaponry'
First broadcast 17th August 2012
It's cudgels at dawn as our two weary warriors fight to decide who is rapier. Holding firearms as big as their entire arms, Mike and Aaron conspire to foist their remarkable weaponry on an unsuspecting public, to general hilarity and some repulsion. Hear an alternative history of conflict, wonder how many legitimate baseball players there are in the UK, all the while chuckling at the unmentioned 'ultimate prank' of setting landmines at a friend's front and back door, before firing teargas through their windows.
Episode 38 - 'Uniform'
First broadcast 10th August 2012
Our two titillating teamsters get out of their civvies and root deep in distinguished workwear and costume for this glorious show. Mike tentatively talks of his displeasure at Her Majesty's Pleasure and the Emergency room, Aaron promotes his upcoming business venture, and the both of them tiptoe around the notion of school uniforms.
Episode 37 - 'Weather'
First broadcast 3rd August 2012
Which topic is number one for bland pleasantries? Hilarious sunburn, panic-buying, and taking flares and huskies to the shop in the snow are among the anecdotes, while pelicans on the beach laugh at old people being blown over.
Episode 36 - 'Folk Devils'
First broadcast 27th July 2012
Pichforks at the ready, as our messy moral entrepreneurs stir up trouble in their own inimitable way, turning the town against you and your heretical kin. You only have yourselves to blame. Shouldn't have spoke out of turn. Shouldn't have worn those awful shoes. Should have joined the winning team.
Episode 35 - 'The Periodic Table'
First broadcast 20th July 2012
Our two Professors of puerile whip out their bunsen burners and toast marshmallows, as they shelter from the elements. If you've ever wondered which representatives of the periodic table only exist for a fraction of a second, why you could potentially fight on the surface of the sun dressed in a full Tungsten body suit, and why a good marriage is like a noble gas, tune in!
Episode 34 - 'Waste'
First broadcast 13th July 2012
Get elegantly wasted with our two slag-heaps, as they pick through the finer points of your rubbish and effluence. Regrets, cowardice and midlife crises also fall under this putrid umbrella. Marvel at anecdotes about long lost plastic shoe horns procured from Christmas crackers, our illogical emotional attachments to inanimate junk, and destroying the toilet bowl.
Episode 33 - 'Narcotics'
First broadcast 6th July 2012
Illicit substances are under the spotlight in this episode. Compulsion, curiosity and cocaine-coated Frosties are on the agenda, as our two anal apothecaries tread carefully over broken needles and jerry cans. Their bulging pupils betray them in the end though, as they succumb to the insatiable lure of Donkey Dust.
Episode 32 - 'Pastimes'
First broadcast 29th June 2012
Hobbies and leisure pursuits are up for debate in this fun-packed edition of everyone's favourite amateur radio show! The most mouth-watering escapades known to man are discussed, including code-cracking, extreme napping, and insect holocausts. Make these two clowns your favourite pastime.
Episode 31 - 'DIY'
First broadcast 22nd June 2012
Brothers are doing it for themselves! A Late Night classic ensues, with our two nutty numbskulls go off with their nail guns half-cocked, as the house falls down around them. Despite the rather familial theme, the mood soon turns malevolent, as drunk hammering, hilarious accidents and murder weapons blacken the previously convivial tone.
Episode 30 - 'Highlights Show'
First broadcast 15th June 2012
A cavalcade of comic cuts from previous Late Night Larges is knitted together for your delectation. Ideal for a Large novice, to lead you into the dark and sleazy alleys to come...
Episode 29 - 'Evolution'
First broadcast 8th June 2012
Our two gene genies get down with Charles Dazza as they reluctantly denounce the myth that Mike created the Heavens and the Earth with his potent seed. Overpopulation and eugenics are touched upon as they comment on Nature's wondrous spirit of creativity with: "Is that it?"
Episode 28 - 'Jubilee'
First broadcast 1st June 2012
Large save the Queen! Our two rowdy rebels get down with the Establishment for a while, genuflecting to their hereditary superiors as they wave their crown jewels in your face. More awkward jokes than Prince Philip's wildest dreams!
Episode 27 - 'The FA Premier League'
First broadcast 25th May 2012
In honour of the 20th anniversary of its inception, Aaron 'Ogie' Bliss plays a hospital ball to Mike 'Headless Chicken' Large as they debate just what it is that makes the Premier League such riveting viewing. The best kits, wind-up merchants and longest criminal records form the more unorthodox topics in this veritable orgy of top flight romanticism, so strap on your shinpads (and ear plugs).
Episode 26 - 'The Planets'
First broadcast 18th May 2012
One of the classics ensues here, when our two stargazing black holes get stuck into the solar system and the wonders contained herein. Expect a few innuendoes about heavenly bodies, Total Recall references, and how Uranus is particularly windy and full of methane. No room for Pluto though, much to Mike's chagrin.
Episode 25 - 'Great Partnerships'
First broadcast 4th May 2012
In a shameless display of self-congratulation, the quarter-century is celebrated with a discussion on great duos of our times. Whether romantic or comic, fighting crime or just smoking weed, chemistry is defined as that which binds the tandems of accomplishment. Or money.
Episode 24 - 'Pubs'
First broadcast 27th April 2012
One of the stone-cold classics, with boozers being the topic for discussion! Blotto Bliss and Lairy Large stagger from grog-house to grog-house singing about brawling and suchlike. Every aspect of the modern pub is chewed over, from decor to clientele to snacks. And, of course, the finest pub names. They're British institutions after all, much like our two mirth-makers.
Episode 23 - 'Tax'
First broadcast 13th April 2012
The most toxic issue of our, or any, time in history is the topic for tonight's head banging. How many different ways are we taxed? Is adequate wealth redistribution possible? Or necessary? Are all classes contributing fairly according to their means? Our burdensome bounty hunters bash heads about the changing face of taxation since the 80s, and debate which taxes are logical and which are unjust and self-defeating. Expect suggestions for superior progressive taxation and plenty of anti-Establishment polemic!
Episode 22 - 'Meat'
First broadcast 23rd March 2012
Our two meat-heads get the meat sweats as they drool over the myriad varieties of dead creature flesh. Expect to hear Mike valiantly defend his masculinity through the medium of carnivorous consumption, get all 'Animal Farm' as the pair ask if some animals are more equal than others, and discuss the ethics of cannibalism: the sweetest taboo.
Episode 21 - 'Global Warming'
First broadcast 16th March 2012
Don't worry, there are no statistics or tree hugging. It's simply a tango on the ice caps, as our two wasteful wastrels suggest we all sacrifice a little for the common good. Will we suffer 100 degree winters next century? Will the economy have to be rebalanced when half of London is underwater? Hear the hypothetical answers to these questions and more!
Episode 20 - 'Moral Dilemmas'
First broadcast 9th March 2012
Another thought-provoking edition, as our nihilistic narcissists pretend to be people with consciences. Mike raises the spectre of coitus cum minoris, Aaron narrates a sordid tale of cannibalism on the High Seas, while they both deliberate the heavy load of the drug mule.
Episode 19 - 'Freedom'
First broadcast 2nd March 2012
One of the most serious and insightful shows thus far, our two champions of liberty invite you to cast off your shackles, take off your clothes and howl at the moon. Among the highlights are discussions of the concepts of positive and negative liberties, personal autonomy and why Mike believes some old people are just arseholes.
Episode 18 - 'Piracy'
First broadcast 24th February 2012
What shall we do with these drunken sailors? Blissbeard and First Mate Large get through a keg of rum as they guide us through the intricate history of piracy, both of the high seas and...the other kind. Sit back and enjoy a brief revisiting of some of the most iconic plunderers, how a pirate ship was more democratic than the average UK workplace, just how a sweaty guy with a camcorder in the cinema never gets caught, and the emergence of the dreaded Black Hood.
Episode 17 - 'Senses'
First broadcast 17th February 2012
You won't believe your ears....eyes, tongue, nose or fingers, as the five, or some say, six senses are pontificated over by our senseless simpletons. Mike attempts to rank the senses in order of personal value, and gets worked up over the notion that being impervious to pain could be a good thing.
Episode 16 - 'Love'
First broadcast 10th February 2012
Our two lamentable lotharios give us the 9 1 1 on the most notorious of four letter words. Among the talking points are the commercialisation of Valentines' Day, the lost art of romance encapsulated by the Milk Tray Man's middle-age spread, and why self-immolation is the only credible show of devotion to that special someone.
Episode 15 - 'Travel'
First broadcast 3rd February 2012
Our two wandering prophets of anarchy discuss the wonders of seeing the world through not a television screen, but your own eyes. If happiness is a transient state, then why do we continue to stand still geographically? Is it cowardice, lack of ambition or simply a longing for the comforts of home which see us plant our roots and rarely move? Park your hovercraft for a moment and enjoy, while we all eagerly await time travel to become affordable for the masses.
Episode 14 - 'Mod Cons'
First broadcast 27th January 2012
An enlightening edition which sees our two loony Luddites debate which modern conveniences have most improved our collective lives, and whether is it a good thing that it's easier to blow up things than ever before. From the godsend of indoor plumbing, we move to the online DIY porn and arms industry, before quickly retreating into an armoured bomb shelter.
Episode 13 - 'Superstition'
First broadcast 20th January 2012
What's a little voodoo curse between friends? Our two shrunken heads combat crawl under a row of ladders, and proceed to deride those who believe that supernatural forces can affect events, while being very careful not to smash mirrors. Mike may also reveal what he likes to throw horseshoes on to.
Episode 12 - 'Breakfast'
First broadcast 13th January 2012
Wolf down the breakfast of champions, as Bliss and Large reminisce over childhood breakfast times, morning telly, hangover cures and American nutritional debacles. Would you like chocolate sauce or double cream with your sugar-dusted pancakes coated with syrup and marshmallows?
Episode 11 - 'Social Networks'
First broadcast 6th January 2012
The mighty internet leviathans are ripe for mulling and mockery from our two mischievous malcontents, as they discuss which social network is truly number one. Expect to also hear the pair bite the hand that feeds them, as they slate the site their page is promoted on, as well as mention of cultural phenomena spewing forth from these institutions, including trolling, apps and the dreaded frape!
Episode 10 - 'New Year'
First broadcast 30th December 2011
Our fresh-faced fillets of fun deliberate over the turning of the calendar page, including the archetypes of New Year partiers, the Village people and our impending doom following the conclusion of the Mayan calendar.
Episode 9 - 'Christmas'
First broadcast 16th December 2011
Our two prize gooses chew the fat of the most wonderful time of the year, taking in a Banbury Christmas Carol, cheese footballs, letting strangers dressed as Santa into your house, and being ejected by security from a department store for having the temerity to be barged into a shelf by some aggressive Christmas shoppers.
Episode 8 - 'Ultimate Battles'
First broadcast 9th December 2011
The gruesome twosome get interactive with their audience for the first (and possibly last) time, as they theme the show based on a poll from fans of the Facebook page. Sit with jaw agape as two incongruous inanimate objects/people/characters are pitted against one another in an imaginary battle royale, where nobody really wins.
Episode 7 - 'Arnie films'
First broadcast 2nd December 2011
Our two deluded weeds let off some steam and spend the show eroticising the Austrian man mountain formerly known as Hercules in New York. Marvel in their poor Shwarzeneggerisms as they insist it's not a tumour and they're not perverts, while demanding you hand over your clothes, boots and motorcycle. Oh and don't worry, they'll be back. GET TO THE CHOPPER!!
Episode 6 - 'Apocalypse'
First broadcast 25th November 2011
Our two harbingers of doom debate the manner of our ultimate demise. Will it be Comet? Or Cupid? Perhaps zombies, aliens or killer robots will stalk the killing fields, amid a gigantic wave of molten metal smothering us all. Messrs Bliss and Large also debate slaughter (and subsequent barbecue) of the innocents as the potential meaning of life, which action hero could potentially prove to be our saviour, and why Mike would like to use his final moments to punch people right in the face.
Episode 5 - 'Corporate Icons'
First broadcast 18th November 2011
MC McCheese and DJ Hamburglar guide us through the amusing and seductive world of corporate icons. Listen on to learn, amongst other things: the suspected whereabouts of the Frosties kid; who would win in a fight between Colonel Sanders, Ronald McDonald and the Burger King; why Mister Soft needs to kick his Ketamine habit; and how Toilet Duck can get the party started.
Episode 4 - 'Transgression'
First broadcast 11th November 2011
Seven deadly sins: seven ways to win! Join our reprehensible reprobates as they wallow in the foetid trough of vice without a care in the world; shamelessly taking Dante's inferno to hitherto unplumbed depths. Wrath, Envy, Pride, Lust, Greed, Gluttony and Sloth: they're all represented by our two totems of transgression.
Episode 3 - 'Laughter'
First broadcast 4th November 2011
Raise a titter, or perhaps a guffaw, as the duo debate the semantics and social etiquette of laughter, question whether one who can amuse is the best kind of polyglot, and Mike tells the worst joke in history.
Episode 2 - 'Halloween'
First broadcast 28th October 2011
Where our heroes learn the true spirit of Samhain, and Mike discusses why he'd like to exhume Michael Jackson's corpse and doesn't believe in sharing sweets with children. Set your spines to 'shiver'.
Episode 1 - 'Retro computer games'
First broadcast 21st October 2011
Two awkward virgin broadcasters take to the air armed with just a mic and a Klobb, with the radar off. Hear them grow in stature (in more ways than one) as they rise from their graves and yell 'HADOUKEN!' to the world!
Aaron Bliss and Mikey Large
With thanks to www.freesfx.co.uk for the Late Night Large sound effects.